No more long runs, but still plenty to do

So I made it through my last long run on Sunday. It was probably the first run all week in which I didn't feel like total garbage, and the timing couldn't have been better. I mean, it's one thing to feel like crap while running for, say, 40 minutes, but it is entirely another to feel that way for an hour and 45 minutes. I mean, at the level of crappiness I was experiencing earlier in the week it would've been a wonder if I hadn't had to call someone to come pick me up. So it was encouraging to actually run feeling strong the whole time, even if my pace was at the general sucky level. And that was my last weekend of typical Ironman training before the race. I spent the rest of the day contemplating Chrissie Wellington's 8:31 finish in Roth, setting a new women's Ironman record. Wow.

Yesterday was my favorite: nothing but a recovery swim. In the winter, I don't so much enjoy the recovery swims because it involves a lot of counting laps and swimming back and forth for a really long time without stopping. However, you tell me to go and swim nice and easy in the lake for an hour and I have no problem with it. It even usually makes me feel better.

I know you haven't heard me complain about the weather in a while and there's a reason for that: there hasn't been any need to. It's actually been nice out. The rain has been gone for a while and the sun has been out. The only issue now is that it is still technically unseasonably cool out. In July we should definitely be well into the 80's, but we've been stuck in the low to mid 70's. The thing is, we were stuck in the upper 50's for so long that it almost feels like 90. All I know is, I'm not going to complain, even if it is pretty chilly first thing in the morning. It sure does make it mentally easier to get out there and train.

But what did I have to do today? Ride the trainer! Ugh, I thought I was done with that thing for a while, but coach decided that today's workout would be based on targetting a certain wattage, and that meant I needed to park myself in the basement instead of enjoying the nice weather outside. I guess it was kind of nice to get to watch an Ironman Hawaii DVD for inspiration, but I'd still rather be outside. Not to mention the fact that the trainer always makes everything harder! At least I got to run and swim outside today, which is always nice, especially in good weather.

I was asked today if I was nervous about the race. Honestly, at this point I'm not even really thinking about it. All I really think about is crossing off each day of training. Training just gets annoying at this point. I'm tired. I want to rest. I'm hungry and I want to EAT. Not more carrots and broccoli either, but REAL food. At this point there's really nothing you can do to add fitness, just maintain what you've got. So the workouts almost seem pointless. I know they're not, otherwise we'd all just lie on the couch for the last two weeks, but I still don't want to have to do any of it. It still feels like a lot even though it's half what I was doing a few weeks ago.

So all I think about is the annoying training still left to go and all of the food I want to eat but can't. My sister invited me over for quesadillas. Do you know how much I love quesadillas? Nope, no quesadillas for me. She also told me she is trying out a new chocolate chip cookie recipe. My sister has been making delicious chocolate chip cookies since she was allowed to use the oven I think, so I don't think I've been eating them almost my entire life. Nope, no cookies, either. I know, I know, boo-hoo, wah wah. But seriously, I get edgy when the race approaches and my mind tends to focus on these silly little things instead of the actual race.

I probably won't even start to think about it at all until I arrive in Lake Placid. I used to get incredibly excited to go up there, and I guess I still do because I love it, but it's also kind of weird. I mean, after 2006 when I won a few people started to recognize me. That's not really the problem, though. The problem is that I haven't been able to live up to that expectation since. So I sort of miss that anonymity. At least this year I at least look the part again, so just by seeing me people don't immediately have to wonder, "geez, what the heck happened to her?"

That of course won't save me from a poor race performance, but I honestly have no clue what will happen there anyway. I can only go out and do what I know how to do and hope that it all works out ok. I likely won't get nervous until I start thinking about the swim start, which is probably the only time where I pretty much fear for my life. Any time I think about it in the final few days before the race it makes my stomach churn. But I know from experience that usually, as soon as I am in the water waiting for the cannon to go off, I usually feel a strange sense of calm. I take the race one little bit at a time, never thinking ahead to running 26 miles at the end of the day. Any time during training when I think about running a marathon it seems near impossible. Honestly, when I break it down that way it sounds even more daunting than doing an Ironman. Like, yeah, I'm doing an Ironman a week from Sunday. But then if I think, whoa, I have to run a marathon? That's scary!

Among more randomness for the day, I can't stop thinking about food. I mean exactly what I'm going to eat when this race is over. I've started making a list and prioritizing and trying to figure out how to get it all in. I think I may have to do a lot of baking and cooking for myself in order to make it work. Among other things, today I've started a list of foods that I will NOT be eating after the race. This was prompted by my eating some baby carrots. I'd never been a huge fan of baby carrots, but I often used to dip them in hummus instead of pita chips for obvious reasons, even though pita chips are incredibly delicious. Well, I can see myself going a bit overboard with the hummus right now, something I don't need, so I was just eating the carrots just for the sake of putting something in my ever-growling tummy. It only took like 4 of them before I decided I never want to eat them again. I also don't want any more yogurt, cottage cheese, broccoli, egg whites or spinach. I'll still eat chicken, but it will be either fried or cheese covered or wrapped in a tortilla or something to that effect. I will also probably still eat fruit because it tastes good, but won't waste too much precious stomach space on it. Unless I come across a really good apple crisp, then I will eat lots and lots of apples!

Yep, this is definitely the part of the taper where I start to go the most insane! If only I didn't have to swim 5000 yards in the morning, especially in the pool, but we're so close now...